Thanking Mom

I loved this list and thought you might, too... if you want more, visit the source: Mother's Day Celebration.

Mother's Dictionary of Meanings

• Dumbwaiter: One who asks if the kids would care to order dessert.
• Feedback: The inevitable result when the baby doesn't appreciate the strained carrots.
• Full Name: What you call your child when you're mad at him.
• Grandparents: The people who think your children are wonderful even though they're sure you're not raising them right.
• Hearsay: What toddlers do when anyone mutters a dirty word.
• Independent: How we want our children to be for as long as they do everything we say.
• Puddle: A small body of water that draws other small bodies wearing dry shoes into it.
• Show Off: A child who is more talented than yours.
• Sterilize: What you do to your first baby's pacifier by boiling it, and to your last baby's pacifier by blowing on it and wiping it with saliva.
• Top Bunk: Where you should never put a child wearing Superman jammies.
• Two-Minute Warning: When the baby's face turns red and she begins to make those familiar-grunting noises.